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If you hate those stupid banners in MSN Messenger as much as I do, you’ll be overjoyed to use this little tool I found:
You can remove the ad banner from the main window, the msn search, and the text ads from your chat windows.
Fucking cool!
(And for those nitpickers who want to point out the advertising pays for the service to be provided free… STFU!)
30.Oct.08 
Fun, Web / Programming 
Comments (0)
Eggzactly my thoughts..
Somehow I rather doubt that this guy’s sperm would get near any eggs, unless it’s the ones he had for breakfast.
Tags: homo
21.Oct.08 Fun, Random Comments (0)
Ready, Set…
Door to door, it normally takes me about 63 minutes to get to work. Coming home, it’s about 78 minutes.
I drove to work today, which took 35 minutes. I told you our public transport is shit.
Can’t wait to see how quick I can get to work on the bike.
10.Oct.08 Fun, Work Comments (0)
Lampe Berger.. Mmmm… burger…
I had some weird fun after work today - My Ex, Andrew, asked me to come along to listen to some sales guys talk about Lampe Berger. His brother stupidly invested some cash in it, and Andrew wanted a 3rd opinion on whether it looked like a scam or not. (Like, duh!)
So we got to their office (9th floor, 3xx Lt Collins St) and there’s a couple of Hongkies there, handshakes handshakes, blah blah blah, Suit and LV overkill.. this was shaping up to be hillarious. So then the head honcho comes in - another Hongkie with the ugliest looking acne pock face i’ve ever seen - I think his mother should’ve thrown him away and kept the placenta. Evidently he’s got a double degree in masturbation in something, and is an expert in something else. Riiiight.
So Henry has stupidly told them that we’re here to suss things out, so we just act polite and say we want to hear how it all works.
So Fugly gets his pen out, and starts with all the marketing bullshit, tiptoeing around the main issue - WHO THE FUCK WANTS TO BUY LAMPS!? (They also sell face care, but one look at crater-face and you know that doesn’t work)
Then Andrew asks Henry a question: Which would you rather buy.. a LAMP or an IPOD? Of course Bulldog-ass says he’d choose the lamp, but Henry sits there not knowing which to choose. Of course he was wanting to say IPOD, but that wouldn’t be good now, would it?
Next thing I know, Number Two takes Henry to another room, presumably because the conversation was no longer going their way - ie they were hearing stuff they didn’t want to hear. Oh no, we’re not airheads!
Evidently I don’t want the lamp because i don’t appreciate it. So Scabies-face gets this fat bimbo to try and tell me all about the lamp, but she couldn’t sell a cat to its’ mother. But I did learn something… evidently we need OZONE in our air to live! And all this time I thought we needed OXYGEN… Funny, huh.
It’s also amusing to note that every time Herpes Simplex made a point (sorta, la) all his minions would nod in agreement. Every time i’d shoot mortar holes in it, they’d snort in disgust.
As I mentioned to him, his business plan was fine - IF people didn’t have brains. Not everyone wants a… lamp. If they did, yes, it would be a money maker. But alas, some people have a brain (those who don’t buy into Lampe Berger!)
Over the hour long conversation, a few more minions arrived, each with their lamp and LV bag. I reckon someone was sms-ing madly from the other room, calling for more reinforcements.
Andrew asked to see their financials. Something obvious you’d do, if you were going to invest in a company of any sort. No, was the answer. Then some fat pogger over the back fucks himself over with the example ‘If you asked to see BHP’s financials, they wouldn’t give them to you!’ Well actually yes they would, because they’re a listed company and their financials are in the public domain. Don’t quit your day job, whatever that is.. doughboy.
I then pointed out to Minge Minge that if a contract was indeed signed by Henry, he has 7 working days (ok, at least 3) to back out with a full refund. ‘Cooling off period’. He didn’t acknowledge that. Of course.
Oh, evidently normal franchises are bad because the chain owner can just revoke it off you and then start up and take over. Yeah.. bet you learnt that one at that double degree business school, didn’t ya, twat-breath? Yes, McDonalds is also downsizing. Ahem. Right.
As it looked more and more apparent to Mr Vesuvius that he wasn’t going to win us over, the trademark snobbish hongkie attitude leeched out. I saw no point in continuing, so Andrew and I left. But not before he said ‘You can leave now’..
Expect an audit from the tax man, cuntface.
Funny shit, that.
01.Sep.08 Fun, Random Comments (0)
Woohoo! Sugoi!
They say a bargain is only a bargain if you need it. Right? Wrong. And who are ‘they’, anyway?
But yeah, there’s a reason I refrain from looking at travel sites.
Here’s a theoretical scenario:
Load up airline website.
Notice sales advertisement.
Click on search.
Choose some random dates in the distant future.
Click search.
Oh, wow, available seats. Cheap.
Think for awhile.
Try and think of reasons you can’t go.
Then BOOK it anyway.
Actually, that’s not theoretical. I’m off to Japan in March! Coincidently, that’s when the Fertility Festival is on too. Funny shit.
Now I just have to work out my itinerary. Plenty of time though..
17.Aug.08 Fun, Holiday Comments (0)
More Gambags!
Furthermore to my original Gambag post, I noticed someone carrying one on the train today. But there was something different about it…
With just a few folds and the right angle, “Country Road” suddenly becomes something totally different.. I almost burst out laughing, but managed to contain myself. Ahem.
Tags: Country Road, GAMbag
20.Jun.08 Fun, Random Comments (0)
Shopping, Sale-a-vie (C’est la vie)
Indeed, that’s life, but it’s not a bad way to spend it.
Sales are good. Visiting countries where the exchange rate is strong (or is it weak? Whatever, as long as it’s in your favour!) and having sales there is even better.
But as i’m not on holiday in KL or SG at the moment, I did the next best thing. Louis would argue that eBay would be the next best thing, but I prefer to try things on before I buy them. There’s no worse disappointment than unwrapping a parcel and finding you hate what you’ve bought. “But it looked good in the picture…”
Armani Exchange (Upto) 70% Off Sale.
At lunchtime, I managed to find a funky pair of shorts that i’d seen - but not bought - in Singapore, and also some trackpants for gym. And I received a John Flynn and a Banjo Paterson (and a couple of Aboriginals) as change, in exchange for my Dame Nellie Melba.
True, I didn’t need a Bag-man to help carry all my purchases home, but I still had that tingly feeling all the same.
Tags: Armani Exchange, Shopping
12.Jun.08 Fun, Home Comments (2)
Singapore Again (Part 9)
Last night, it rained. Today I woke up, and it was still raining. The sky was overcast, and it looked like it’d rain all day. Maybe.
On my way to Suntec on the bus the other day, I noticed a shopping centre I hadn’t explored. Plaza Singapura. Just near Dhoby Ghaut MRT. Today, I decided to see what they had inside.
Armed with my umbrella and headphones, I left the flat. By the time I got to the bus stop, my pants were pretty much saturated from the knees down. My bag was also a bit wet, but luckily it’s waterproof so my camera was safe.
I waited awhile for the bus to arrive, and then hopped on when it did. I sat up the front on the second level (double decker!) so I got a few interesting photos on the way;
This is at the intersection on Tanglin Road. As you can see, it’s been pouring, and everything is thoroughly soaked. Unlike when it rains back in Melbourne, which is barely enough to cover the ground.
Here’s one of the new shopping centres that is going up in Orchard Rd. They seem to have put up a lot more structural stuff in 2 1/2 months since I was last here, though it’s not yet taking shape. Maybe next visit.
The Homo Gym. Otherwise known as California Fitness. Not cheap. I think Gage’s friend, Chad, mentioned that he pays about $1000 for 6 months or something. I could be wrong tho.
Here’s another shopping centre that’s going up. This one is taking shape, from what I can see, anyway.
A short time later I alighted at Plaza Singapura. *Tap* with my tap card. I wonder if Melbourne’s Myki cards will be this easy when/if ever we get them?
There were quite a few levels to explore, but first stop was lunch! I headed downstairs, as that’s where I figured the food court would be.
I was tempted to try Burger King, but explored further. Then I saw a Carl’s Jr burger chain, and thought they might be decent.
I saw the big ad for the Jalapeno Chicken Burger Meal, and decided that would be lunch.
I ordered, and was given a cup and a number. I filled my cup with their own ‘Iced Lemon Tea’, which, when I tasted it, was like normal tea gone cold. Not cold, not sweet. Bleah. I hoped the rest of the meal would be better.
The burger and fries arrived, and surprisingly, the fries were half cold. I held out hope that the burger would be ok. It was the size of a whopper, but it didn’t look anything like the picture on the billboard. It tasted pretty crap, so if all the Carl’s Jr chain stores taste this bad, I don’t know how they survive. I want my money back. I couldn’t finish the burger and the fries. And it’s not just coz they tasted crap, my stomach was reminding me it was smaller now. Good tum tum.
Good old Americans. At least if they don’t have big penises, they still have their big burgers. And big trucks. And big egos. [Penis Envy?]
After that rather disappointing and slightly unsettling lunch, I began my shopping adventures.
I found a funky canvas belt in one of the department stores, as well as some ankle socks. I only wanted the socks because I was short 1 pair, so this way I didn’t have to do washing again until I got back to Oz! 
I also scored two really cheap powerplug converters in Best, which is like our RetraVision or Good Guys stores. $1.50 each. Even in Sim Lim they were trying to sell them for $4.50. Ripoff!
Then I wandered into Carrefour. Similar to our Coles stores because it sells groceries, but that’s about where the similarities end. Apart from some of the meat being grossly overpriced (it all is, everywhere - Australian Beef? $33+ per kg, depending on the cut..) most things were relatively cheap. Either that or it was just really fresh, or huge range.
For example, look at these tongs. They’re normal size tongs. Now look at the King Prawns. SAME SIZE! Our King Prawns back in Footscray are nowhere near that size. That’s just too good. I want Thai prawn curry. Now.
I wandered around the store, either giggling or gaping at the prices and selection on offer. One thing Singapore lacks though, is decent Salt & Vinegar chips. That’s why G1 asked me to bring a couple of packs over with me. Here, if there’s such a thing as artificial vinegar, they use that. Not the real (good) stuff.
After I headed to the checkout with a few things from Carrefour, I continued browsing through the rest of the shopping centre, and found a furniture store having a sale. They had some quite nice stuff, but no way would it fit in my luggage. I needed a Mokona to swallow it. (If you don’t watch xxxHolic, don’t worry about that comment)
After I finished there, I walked across the road. Furniture stores. Very expensive ones. But they had nice stuff. Then I walked back along Orchard Rd, and called into a Camera shop. I got the guy to fit a new screen protector to my camera, as the old one had started peeling off. $15. Not bad.
While I was in the camera shop, I got a call from Aaron. He had an hour to kill before heading back to work for a meeting, so we decided to catch up for a coffee. I walked back to Dhoby Ghaut and caught the MRT back to City Hall, and then we met up at Coffee Club.
I ordered an iced coffee, and Aaron got a Chicken Pie, and chatted until it was time for him to head back to work.
I accompanied him as far as Bugis on the MRT, then did a bit of window shopping for an hour or so. Then I headed back to Orchard Rd, and dropped in to say hi to Gage. After that I wandered around Centrepoint, and found a pair of work pants at Domanchi for $39. Bargain!
It took awhile to get a pair in my size that I liked, as the stupid sales girl couldn’t get through her thick head that when I said I wanted 32, I wanted 32. Not any other size. Did I mention it’s hard to find good help these days?
I met up with G2, and we had dinner at the foodcourt nextdoor. Yummy Pad Thai. G1 joined us, and then we took a taxi home.
I surfed the net for awhile, looking up some prices on Sim Lim’s website. I found that hard drives were a lot cheaper here than back in Oz, even though I can get them at wholesale price. Hmm…
With that thought, I got ready for bed, and slept.
14.May.08 Food, Fun, Holiday Comments (0)
Singapore Again (Part 8)
Since I got to bed earlier last night, I woke up earlier! 10.30 to be exact. G1 had gone already, and G2 was all dressed ready to go.
I quickly ran through the shower and got dressed, and we caught the train to Bugis, then walked to Sim Lim.
The first stop was to get my Synology Cube Server. I forgot my post-it note so I didn’t know the shop number, but I knew it was on the 4th floor. We walked around, and around and around and around. I couldn’t find it! Then we walked around the 3rd and 5th floors, just incase I was mistaken. Still couldn’t find it. Then I wasted about $15 of GPRS internet trying to find their website and pricing pdf’s, just to get their address.
In the end, it turned out that THEY WEREN’T FUCKING OPEN. How slack is that? Rolladoors were still down, which is why I kept walking past it.
We went upto level 6, and got Gerard’s server case, some cables, a cable tidy, and some mounting screws. Then we paid for it all, and lugged it downstairs. The server case was DAMN heavy, but i managed. We stopped by the 4th floor while I ran to have a look to see if my store had opened, and ABOUT TIME.. they had just rolled up the doors. Evidently they had some meeting that went longer than supposed to, so they didn’t open the shop until now. I told them they were slack, and it wasn’t good enough. They should have discounted me $15 for all the GPRS net I wasted trying to find them.
So I bought my Raid Cube, and went back to Gerard at the lift. We lugged everything downstairs, then to the GST Claim counter. Filled out all the forms, and got about $42 back. Yay! Then we lugged everything out to the taxi rank and loaded it into a cab (at least those old Toyota Crowns’ have a big boot!) and Gerard set off to work with it all. I remembered we’d forgotten to get a wireless access point, so I went back to get it. I was going to have a wander around Bugis again for awhile, then head over to G2’s workplace later.
I found a Linksys WAP54G at one shop for $105, then at a different shop for $88. You seriously have to know your pricing, and never buy the first one you see.
Afterward, I headed back to Bugis Junction and had lunch in the food court. I saw a sign for a rather yummy looking fried rice, so I ordered that. Unfortunately what I was served barely resembled the picture, and there was more rice than anything else. Next time i’ll stick to what I know. I didn’t finish all the fried rice (and not just because it was crap), I think today was the first time i’d noticed my stomach had shrunk. From all the smaller meals i’d been having, I was now used to eating less. Which combined with all the walking (not to mention the sauna-like heat), was hopefully doing me the world of good.
I walked around a bit more, and bought a $6 topup for my phone. After this morning’s little effort, I only had 25c left of credit. Also, as I was on a prepaid card, if your credit falls below $5, it will give you a pre-recorded message before EVERY call you make, until you top up again. I guess it’s useful in a way, but it’s also fucking annoying. That’s on top of it telling you what your balance is the first time you use it every day. Did I also mention that I get charged for incoming calls? Yeah, that’s another feature of prepaid here (with StarHub anyway). But on the upside, I kept getting free sms’s. I’d send 5, and then i’d get 10 free to use that day. Evens out in the end, I guess.
I got bored about 4pm, and I also wanted to beat peak hour, so I headed off to catch a bus to G2’s work. After getting directions on which bus to catch, I was on my way.
It took quite awhile to get there, as the buses seem to double-back on themselves just to cover the whole area. I guess if you want to get somewhere in a hurry, you could take a cab (or the MRT, if it goes where you want to go).
Eventually, I got there. G2 met me where the bus stopped, then we went to the shopping centre again. He grabbed some Subway for one of his coworkers, and while he was doing that, I got a couple of donuts. Then we went back to the office. I tried one of the donuts, and it was fucking disgusting. It tasted like it was about 3 days old, and the chocolate icing tasted bad as well. Granted, it was from a different donut chain, but nothing compared to the one I had at IMM in Jurong.
G2’s co-workers were working until about 9pm, so I couldn’t switch off the server or unplug the patch cables until then. In the meantime, I compiled a list of sites (msn servers and web messenger sites) we were going to block on each of the office computers using the ‘hosts file’ method, and ‘fixed’ the ones that weren’t being used. Then I unwrapped the server case and configured the wireless access point, and rearranged some stuff in the server rack that could be moved without unplugging.
Then the co-workers all left, and it was funtime. Time to gut the server, rebuild it, and pray it’d still work. So off I went. I pulled it all to bits on the table, then used most of the pieces to rebuild it in the rack case. Then I went to mount it in the rack, and realised that mounting rails weren’t included. D’oh!
While I was doing that, Gerard went around to the leftover computers, and put the hosts file on them.
So I used an existing shelf and just lowered it a bit, then put the rackmount case on the shelf. And then put the monitor / keyboard on that. Voila, it worked first go! I thought that was pretty good.
After that win, I pulled out all the cables and repatched them into the switch, neatly. That took awhile, as they were long cables and they were going everywhere.
We looked at the time: 1am. Not too bad for the amount of work I did. One thing left to do.. the bill! Oh wait, it was a love job. 
We locked up, and just as we reached the road, a taxi came along. We hailed it, and headed home. Showered, then hit the hay. Zzzzzz..
13.May.08 Food, Fun, Holiday Comments (0)
Singapore Again (Part 7)
I woke up late again today, probably around 12. Bathed, got dressed, headed to the bus stop.
Took bus alll the way to Suntec, and had BBQ Pork Buns and Siu Mai for lunch.
I noticed this sign while I was there.. How exactly were these prawns fortunate? They got caught and made into dumplings! That’s not fortunate!
Then instead of catching the MRT, I decided to walk to Bugis Junction. I figured it wasn’t so far, as I thought I passed nearby on the bus on my way here. So I walked back the way the bus came. And walked and walked and walked, then turned right and walked some more… and as I walked past a white building, I saw a sign on the side. Sim Lim Square! This is where you come in Singapore to buy tech stuff.
I went inside and wandered around all the shops, one level after another. At about level 4 the call of nature came upon me, so I went to visit the loo. There were two stalls, one western and one squat. And luckily I checked if there was toilet paper, because there wasn’t. You had to take what you needed from the big roll near the sink.
While I was getting the paper, someone came in and went straight into the stall. Hmph! But at least he went in without any toilet paper, so serves himself right. I took the stairs to level 5, and used the toilet there. It smelt like it was backed up.. ie SHIT. Then the cleaner came in and sprayed, so it smelt like ’summer breeze’ for all of 2 minutes, then shit again.
I’m glad I missed these ones in my toilet review that I did last time, because these would have to be the worst (apart from the roadside toilet) toilets i’ve come across in Singapore, and Malaysia. Now that’s pretty poor.
Back to looking at nerdy stuff. I wandered into one shop which was selling NAS (Network Attached Storage), and noticed they were selling a model of NAS that I was toying with the idea of getting back in Oz. My jaw almost hit the floor when he told me the price.. $360 cheaper than buying it back home. And that was a wholesale price I was comparing this to as well!
I pretty much made up my mind that I was going to buy it, I just had to figure out how to transport it back home. I told him i’d be back tomorrow, as I didn’t have my passport (for GST refund) nor my Credit Card.
I continued on, and found the server shop which had rackmount stuff - the stuff Gerard needed to put his desktop server into the Rack Cabinet at work. Most of the enclosures were expensive, but they had one which was surprisingly cheap ($280) - ‘barebones’, but not nasty. Theoretically I could just gut the desktop, put all the contents into the rack case, and mount it in the rack. Simple!
I got the guy to print a specs sheet, and put it in my bag to show Gerard later on.
I walked out the front of Sim Lim, and opposite I recognised the OG store Gage had showed me through the other day. I was kind of getting my bearings now, but still had no idea where Bugis was hiding.
I took out my iPhone, and loaded up Maps. I pushed the “Locate Me” button, and voila! I was… A BLOODY BLOCK AWAY from Bugis. Damnit, so close and I totally missed it.
I walked back in the direction of Bugis, and took a turn which would lead me to it.
I noticed these apartments down an alleyway, and each one had a stairwell painted a different colour. That’d be good if you lived there and came home drunk!
Then I entered the Bugis Marketplace, with all its stalls and semi-permanent shops. I looked in one called Spades, and saw a really fleecy hoodie that I liked. I tried it on (really quickly, 30 degree heat is not hoody-trying-on weather!) and it fitted well. The sales guy gave me a discount, though i’m sure they mark things up specifically so they can give every customer a ‘discount’.
As I came to the main road, there was another donut shop strategically placed near the bus stop, to entice people to buy while they’re waiting. Lots of different flavours, but strangely enough with my sweet tooth, I wasn’t even tempted. If that thin chic keeps buying up on the donuts though, she won’t be thin for long.
I crossed the road, then took a couple of photos again. I didn’t know Bugis Market was the largest in Singapore, but I guess it would be, because all the other places are classed as Shopping Malls.
I thought the name of this eatery was a bit unfortunate, I don’t know what it means in Cantonese/Mandarin, but in English, Yu-kee (yucky!) isn’t a good association to have with a restaurant.
Into Bugis Junction I went.
Singaporeans also have a dear love for their acronyms.
HDB, MRT, SMRT, NTUC, NS, SBS, LRT, ICE, PR, PIE, CBD, ATM, AYE, GST, AJ (Ok ok, that one’s rhyming slang), and a whole lot more, so it’s amusing to actually find a sign that’s stuffed them up. Shall we take a trip on the ATM today?
I wandered around all the levels of BJ (haha, see!), browsing in various stores, but didn’t really find anything I liked. Bossini still had a crap range, and Samuel & Kevin seem to have moved over from Gay to Grungy.
I looked at my watch, and it was almost time to meet another friend of mine, Aaron, for dinner. I asked the security guard how to get to the MRT, as I didn’t quite trust the ATM sign to be truthful. Then I followed his directions, and I was soon on the train. One stop and 10 minutes later, I was right on time. I stood near the steps at City Hall, and waited.
Then I got an SMS. He was going to be at least an hour late… what to do, what to do. To kill some time, I walked along the entire length of CityLink Mall a couple of times, then finally settled down in Gelare, with an (expensive) ice cream. Quite creamy, and tasty too, but still overpriced.
Finally it was time to meet Aaron, so I headed back to City Hall. After waiting some more, he arrived. He’s quitting his work (already given notice) but still seems to be working very hard. Back in Australia, once you give notice, it’s pretty much slack-off month, because what are they going to do, sack you? But here in Singapore, evidently the employer can pull some nasty shit on you, and withhold your entitlements unless you work hard until quitting day.
Aaron had to do one last thing, so we walked to some office where he had to choose some invitation designs. That over, then we were free to have dinner. We dropped past a bus stop where his bf was waiting, so I got to meet him - even though he had stuff to do, so could not join us for dinner.
We ended up at Thai Express in Raffles City for dinner. There was a bit of a queue, so they were getting everyone to order while still waiting for a table.
I had a quick flick through the menu, and settled on something that sounded quite decent - “Yellow Ginger Chicken”. Sounded exotic, but yummy. Aaron ordered his ‘usual’, I can’t quite remember the name of it.
Then we were shown to our seats, and we waited.
Not too long later our meals arrived, and mine was… covered… in chilli. I thought “This is going to be interesting..”. I tried it. Zinggg! It was spicy, but good. I could handle it. A few mouthfuls later, I started going for the water. Halfway through, I asked for another glass of water, at which time the waitress told me that i’d ordered the hottest thing on their menu. Thanks for the warning! Bah. Another glass of water, and I managed to get through it. Really tasty, but damn hot. I’d order it again though.
Aaron also ordered a dessert (which took ages to arrive), but I was happy sipping my Lime Juice that i’d ordered to put out the fire.
I wondered how long it’d be until I was running for the nearest toilet, but surprisingly we walked around for ages afterward, and I never needed to go. I figured if I could handle that and not have any ill effects, I think i’m ready for a trip to Thailand.
During the flow of conversation over dinner, I told Aaron about my clubbing experiences. Surprisingly, he said I should have invited him out on Saturday night. I didn’t ask because I knew he wasn’t a clubber, so.. *slap*. Haha.
At about 10.00, it was time for him to head home, so I did the same. Watched some TV with G1 & G2, and also told G2 about the server stuff. He decided to do it, so we’d scoot off to Sim Lim first thing in the morning.
I headed off to bed, and talked to Louis on MSN for awhile before I fell asleep.
12.May.08 Food, Fun, Holiday Comments (0)
